A lot can be said of independence, it’s empowering … liberating .. even freeing, yet it can also be freakin exhausting. *I’m sure some feminist somewhere just died reading that, but probably not before some tiny part of her went: ‘I hear ya’.
Making all of your own decisions ALL OF THE TIME and bearing the brunt of all of the bad ones can be taxing, especially when you have to pick YOURSELF off the floor after you haphazardly ended up there after yet another couch-related incident that I won’t get into. Sure, these are the days of our ‘adult’ lives, but I’m beginning to suspect people couple up just to share the brunt of these decisions. *I’m all for coupling up, but I’m still not quite keen on settling for an asshole, so that’s still a work in progress.
I don’t think enough credit is given to those brave souls that do all of this life stuff mano-a-mano: forced to rush into the battleground of daily decisions again and again, hoping that this round may yield better results, that this time things may be different, that it may become a teensy bit easier to cheer themselves on and keep going when all they wanna do is hide out somewhere in blissful ignorance waiting for someone else to go: ‘no worries, I got this one’. Even just once, that would be pretty neat.
Lucky for me I have a mysterious inherent sunny disposition – like when l accidentally broke my mother’s (ginormous) window whilst visiting over xmas *long story .. I couldn’t help but appreciate the lovely cool breeze coming through the gaping hole, or today after shedding some ‘coping’ tears and dragging my ass to gym I found myself chuckling at this radio ad describing feeling down to putting an orchid in a microwave (way funnier in afrikaans). My sunny disposition keeps me from throwing myself off a cliff .. that and a delicate mixture of wine, chocolate and friends, not necessarily in that order.
I guess what I’m trying to say is this shit is HARD, being an adult is hard, building a business and staying sane whilst remembering to switch off the oven: hard. We should all cut ourselves a little bit of slack for doing alla this shit alone, for being brave enough to keep at it and not shred our clothes and go running down the street naked heading for madness – for not giving up even when it’s hard.
To the brave ones out there, who managed to keep their sanity closely aligned to their sense of humour – I salute you!
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” ~ Winston S. Churchill